im breaking down.

i dont know what causes this.

Me You Us

Why?
Why is everything so different now.
You always left me hanging after every argument.

Green with Envy

What went wrong?
Seriously.

Wasnt like this many years back now i feel so different.

So much different.
haiz

How many days, weeks, months or years since my last post?

im beginnin to hate my life every single bit. i feel i cant be happy anymore. whats more to feel happy? nobody cares about what i say or what i think.

to make them happy i follow whatver or anybody say and let them win or be happy and they have the pride and be proud wherelae i look down and swallow all my emotions.

not some emo shit im spitting,
But seriously life is gettin more and more fucked up.

Im in a mess. My life is in a mess my sociallife is in a mess!

The only thing i feel i accomplishes is to get a Freaking 7D. Thats all. an how pathetic with girlfriend help. i cant even do things on my own for my own.

i want to start school. i love to learn but look what happen?

sobs sobs.
i really cant take this anymore.
really had enough!!!!!

friends never been friends. best never been best. all fake! fake reasons stupid excuses! All cibai!

sometimes..

sometimes i feel....
haiz..
nevermind nevermind...

i am feeling it, now.

[Intro - Spoken]
Yo, I can't sing it
I feel like singin'
I wanna fuckin' sing
Cuz I'm happy
Yeah, I'm happy
Ha Ha
I got my baby back
Yo, check it out
[Verse 1 - Sung]
Some days I sit, starin' out the window
Watchin' this world pass me by
Sometimes I think theres nothin' to live for
I almost break down and cry

Somtimes I think I'm crazy
I'm crazy, oh so crazy
Why am I here, am I just wasting my time?

But then I see my baby
Suddenly I'm not crazy
It all makes sense when I look into her eyes
[Chorus]
Somtimes it feels like the world's on my shoulders
Everyone's leanin' on me
Cuz sometimes it feels like the world's almost over
But then she comes back to me
[Verse 2 - Sung]
My baby girl [Hailie laughs] keeps gettin' older
I watch her grow up with pride
People make jokes, cuz they don't understand me
They just don't see my real side

I act like shit don't phase me,
Inside it drives me crazy
My insecurities could eat me alive

But then I see my baby
Suddenly I'm not crazy
It all makes sense when I look into her eyes
[Chorus]
[Verse 3 - Rapped]
Man, if I could sing, I'd keep singing this song to my daughter
If I could hit the notes, I'd blow something as long as my father
To show her how I feel about her, how proud I am that I got her
God, I'm a daddy, I'm so glad that her mum didn't abort
Now you probly get this picture from my public persona
That I'm a pistol-packing drug-addict who bags on his momma,
But I wanna just take this time out to be perfectly honest
Cuz there's a lot of shit I keep bottled that hurts deep inside o' my soul,
And just know that I grow colder the older I grow
This boulder on my shoulder gets heavy and harder to hold
And this load is like the weight of the world
And I think my neck is breaking should I just give up,
Or try to live up to these expectations?
Now look, I love my daughter more than life in itself,
But I got a wife that's determined to make my life livin'hell
But I handle it well, given the circumstances I'm dealt
So many chances, man, it's too bad, coulda had someone else
But the years that I've wasted are nothing to the tears that I've tasted
So here's what I'm facin':
3 felonies, 6 years of probation
I've went to jail for this woman, I've been to bat for this woman
I've taken bats to peoples backs, bent over backwards for this woman
Man, I shoulda seen it comin', why'd I stick my penis up in?
Woulda ripped the pre-nup up if I'd seen what she was fuckin'
But fuck it, it's over, there's no more reason to cry no more
I got my baby, baby the only lady that I adore, Hailie
So sayonara, try tomorra, nice to know ya
My baby's travelled back to the arms of her rightful owner
And suddenly it seems that my shoulder blades have just shifted
It's like the greatest gift you can get
The weight has been lifted

Now it don't feel like the world's on my shoulders
Everyone's leanin' on me
Cuz my baby know's that her daddy's a soldier
Nothin' can take her from me
[Outro - Spoken]
Woo!
I told you I can't sing.
Oh well, I tried
Hailie, 'member when I said
If you ever need anything, daddy will be right there?
Well guess what?
Daddy's here.
And I ain't goin'nowhere baby
I love you! (kiss)

instead of chasing the paper

Noone could feel how stressful i am lately.

Im not a show & tell kinda person, and i prefer to be quiet,

and stare blankly at the walls, but that doesnt mean my brain is dead.

my brain is always and constantly thinking.

but nothing is moving me.

haiz.